Thursday, November 5, 2015


To take or not to take, to post or not to post? There are many happy souls who glibly take selfies without a second thought, and then there are the goofballs like me, the former wound-tights who agonize over the whole process... before tapping into their inner truths and embracing what is right for them. Selfies are as unique as the amazing individual taking them, and the beauty of the whole thing is, only you can decide what feels right for you.
Personally, selfies have historically been quite a tricky concept for me to wrap a named emotion around. I am inexplicably drawn to taking photos since it helps me feel like I actually exist. Growing up as a middle child in a family of 6, I developed middle child syndrome and often felt invisible. Being naturally introverted and non pushy made it that much easier for me to be overlooked. While my siblings had several overstuffed albums of baby photos each to themselves, I had maybe three baby photos slid hastily into a manila folder. I used to think I was adopted.  What else could have explained the whole missing photo mystery? 
After feeling like I didn't quite exist as a real human as a kid, I unwittingly fell back into a similar phase as an adult. After 2009, I got agoraphobia and dropped out of society, spending the last six years in a surreal like cocoon punctuated only by a visit from the postman or trip to the doctor. It was then that I felt like I was living in a dream, that I was someone else outside my body, looking down at this character who was "me." I started taking photos of myself to prove that I was indeed real.

I guess we take photos for many reasons. To feel real, to actually exist. To relive events. I actually also love taking photos because it feels healthy. It's a way for me to balance out the extreme religious teachings I grew up with, where taking a photo of yourself was considered to be a selfish past time, a taboo activity.

Le'me tell you, there was a lot of preaching in my home growing up about selfishness and pride. I decided to be super humble, but it got to the point of where I was not looking in mirrors or allowing myself to care about what I looked like at all. I didn't let myself even think about taking a photo of myself. I became so colorless and afraid to glow, that it became detrimental.

So there are extremes in both directions, but after my overly modest, unselfish and hyper humble youth, I'm ready to balance it all out and indulge in a huge smile while sharing with you all that I absolutely love selfies. 

I love taking them, and I love when you all take them and post them for your friends to see.

A selfie is life, joy, attitude, self expression.

I just love your selfies. I love when you rock an outfit that you want to share with everyone, and I love that selfie you took when you felt extra radiant. I feel empathy for you when you look down or pensive in your selfie, and I can't help but grin at the selfies of you when you're being goofy. I totally dig the selfies of you and your cross eyed cat, and the ones you take of you with your indignant pet bunny whose face is smashed up against your grinning cheeks. I love your driver's seat selfies, and your almost drunk selfies where you're having a blast out with your friends. The joy just radiates from you.

I love the dressing room selfies where you're totally glamming it up in outfits you never dream of buying, but that look in your eyes says it all. You're having the time of your life... and you shared it with all of us. I love the bathroom mirror selfies that capture the subtle look in your expression that tells a story more than words could say... you're sharing a piece of your day with us with just this simple photo, and it's your way of saying hi to your friends in a creative, cool way.

All these selfies... they are a window into your beautiful, sometimes crazy and chaotic, amazing life, and you willingly share them with all of us... and for that I say thank you, and Namaste.

This summer while I was still in Pennsylvania,
holding Sparky who hopped out of the photo, LOL.

While at a week long music festival
in California this September!

Wearing my new rudraksha, which I love.

Goofy selfie, LOL

Right before I moved to Florida... so happy
to be changing my life!

Namaste, and keep taking selfies!


  1. You are so beautiful!! The more selfies the merrier, I say. I hear you re agonising though. Until I had my awakening, I had a very angsty relationship with selfies. Now I make them as beautiful as I possibly can, because that's how I want to feel. Beautiful. But I don't need selfies to feel beautiful, it's just a form of play - a beautiful form of play, and relating to yourself, and experimenting with yourself as art...

    1. Well said! I agree that it's a great way to play in an artsy way. Much love to you! Namaste. :)


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